30 seconds of honesty, library edition.

Y’all.

I think my very Catholic upbringing requires I own up to things immediately, so the past few months I’ve been feeling VERY guilty not telling anyone that I finally got a library card. I’ve been buying books for my kindle and there are so many on there I haven’t read- and that shiz gets EXPENSIVE. I’ve never really considered book buying to be shopping but it definitely is and right now if it isn’t paint, primer, brushes or boxes, I’m trying not to buy it.

A few months ago a friend suggested a book to me. (Daughter of the God-King by Anne Cleeland. Amazing. Read it!) When I googled it instead of the top result being an amazon link it was a link to my local library using the SAILS platform. Ten minutes later I was reading the e-book.

Since then I’ve checked out a book a week, downloaded straight to my Kindle.

amesfreelibrary — Ames Free Library, so many books I could owe fines on one day.

My last Massachusetts library card was from Tufts Library in Weymouth, MA. I got it in 1983, used it to read every single Nancy Drew book, and by now I must owe them thousands for the three books on the Red Scare and McCarthyism I lost in 1996. When the kids were tiny we would go to that same library often but I was always sure they would run whatever version of a Library Credit Check they had and would shame me publicly or fine me more than I could afford. (yay anxiety) We would go for story time, and to play on their amazing playground, and to read books there, but we never checked any out.

When we moved to Austin, TX I felt confident getting a library card. Certainly my debts wouldn’t follow me there, 20 years later. Certainly the long arm of the Weymouth Library didn’t extend that far. I think I owe Austin Public Library 3.00 for the late return of a Pendergast novel, clearly I am a repeat offender in the Library crime world.

I was hesitant to get another library card, to possibly restart my life of check-out-crime after 8 years on the lam, but the allure of free Regency romance novels was too great. I am a card carrying reader again. E-Books are a safe way to go, after a week they just take them back off of my device, I couldn’t forget to return them even if I tried.

There we are. I’ve confessed my library sins. I feel better.

Better late than never.

overdue

xoxo

some favorites thursday – miscellany edition.

(I originally typed: misandry edition. because it is the end of a very long 2018 so why not.)

1 – 2 – 3 – 4 ?

Imma stream of consciousness this post today.

this doesn’t count as a favorite…

since when is the green lifesaver watermelon? I bought my first roll of non butterscotch lifesavers in easily… I mean, when did they have the mini holes candies? because that long.

holes — 1990. the last time I bought lifesavers was a hot minute ago.

but speaking of misandry (which is also not a favorite) – I had a whole ‘year of the woman writer’ in 2018. Not every voice was perfect but I’m OVER (over over over) boob-dimensional female characters written by men.

I got NO sleep last night because I couldn’t stop reading this book. It was ridiculous and as all over the place as this blog will be today. so it is fitting I include it.

Never Alone by Elizabeth Haynes

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

(closer to 3-1/2 stars) I enjoyed this book, I stayed up until 2 this morning reading it, it was fast paced and interesting – but it was also incredibly frustrating. The men in Sarah’s life were atrocious, she makes terrible decisions, her dogs need leashes, her doors need locks. Beyond that though, solid storytelling with a likable, albeit infuriating, main character.

carmen

I look EVERYTHING up.

before the internet I was a big fan of the card catalogue, the encyclopedia, the reference book. I need to know things and with this glorious anxiety the more information I have the better – how often should I blog? how do I blog? how do I say no to someone who asks to be a houseguest? what is a triple net lease? how do I tell my coworkers I’m leaving my job? what is the difference between an LLC and a Sole Proprietorship? how do I start an art collection? what are the hipster neighborhoods in Orlando? where are the best brunch spots in Orlando? when will there be a Chuy’s in Massachusetts? what information should be on a business card? how do you name a company?

see what I did there? I still haven’t figured out how to tell all of my coworkers that I’m leaving my job at the end of the year.

I love this job, I love this company, I love my coworkers. But it is time for a change.

I’m starting my own company, staying in the industry I’ve been working in for the last 5 years. I’m taking January and February off, I’ve rented a place in Florida for 5 weeks, and I am going to bust out some strategy in the sunshine. (14 miles from the Magic Kingdom because who are we kidding?) I’m freaking the fork out. But I’m 42 and next year both of my kids will be in college, it is time to figure out what I’m going to do when I grow up.

at least until I become an archaeologist.

livingcoral — living coral. is it a color? a call to environmental action? the antithesis of the orange detritus inhabiting the white house? a reminder that the sun will come out tomorrow? am I reading too much into this?

everything is political. with the exception of, like, the president of the united states, he’s just a ruinous piece of garbage. Pantone’s color of the year was announced yesterday and even that announcement felt political.

From their announcement:

Introducing the Pantone Color of the Year 2019, PANTONE 16-1546 Living Coral – an animating and life-affirming coral hue with a golden undertone that energizes and enlivens with a softer edge. Sociable and spirited, the engaging nature of Living Coral welcomes and encourages lighthearted activity. Symbolizing our innate need for optimism and joyful pursuits, Living Coral embodies our desire for playful expression. #COY2019

I want lighthearted activity. Remember lighthearted activity?

brb, gotta figure out how to tell my coworkers I’m leaving the company at the end of the year…

xoxo

three favorites thursday – ‘cyber week’ edition.

Cyber Week. evidently that’s a thing now. Because the onslaught of one time only, limited availability, lowest discount of the season, get it now or you will ruin the holidays forever, isn’t enough on Black Friday and Cyber Monday. It’s Cyber Thursday, do you know where your children are? (and THAT’S how old I am)

I haven’t really done any ‘cyber week’ shopping – I keep thinking I want to, filling up shopping carts, but then abandoning them. But I did find a few things that I think will make excellent presents.

uno

Lin Manuel Miranda. He’s a gift to all of us already, but now his inspirational Gmorning, Gnight messages are illustrated in their own fabulous little book. I have so far purchased three copies of it but reserve the right to give it to EVERYONE this Christmas.

gmorning

your children FOR SURE need this. their teachers might also. siblings. aunts and uncles. the postal worker who delivers all of your packages – you fiend. you need it, your spouse. the world. the world needs this book.

Get one.

LMM’s website (Tee Rico) also has Gnight PAJAMAS. because who doesn’t need a sleep shirt or cozy pants?

rosegold2

my very very favorite eyeshadow palette. I have LOTS of palettes, drawers full, it’s obscene. and usually I wear one color (that isn’t even in this palette) (Urban Decay Lounge) But when I’m not being lazy I bust out the Tartlette In Bloom Palette.

inbloom — neutral but rosy but shimmery but sophisticated

Right now Macy’s has a 15% off code (FRIEND) which makes this just over 33$. BUT if you use Ebates (which you fricking should, and if you don’t please sign up with my link!) today everything at Macy’s will get you 10% cash back.

brush

My favorite eyeshadow brush. the only one I ever ever use and the only one you will ever ever need. (unless you’re wicked fancy in which case I can’t help you) is from Coastal Scents, it is the BR-C-N02 a Medium, Classic, Natural brush and it is a WORKHORSE. I have been using, washing, using, washing, the same brush for at least 5 years.

If you know and love and shop for makeup wearers this will be their favorite stocking stuffer. If you combine it with In Bloom you’ll win Christmas.

threethree

unrelated to Christmas shopping, other than that you need sustenance to keep you going, my other favorite thing this cyber week is Trader Joe’s Spanakopita Pie. I’m on my second one for the week already and I have no regrets. TJ’s was sold out of tzatziki when I went so I had to go to my regular grocery store to get some, because it’s the other best part of this meal.

spanakopita — you’re going to want to get one of these today. maybe get 2.

it’s that perfect amount of salty and flaky and still feels like you’re eating healthy because the thing is full of spinach. Plus it’s pie. It’s the best of all possible worlds.

I am starving right now.

So that’s what I’ve got. Good Luck tomorrow on Cyber Friday and through what I assume will be the Cyber Weekend…?

xoxo

bucket-list my feelings. archaeology edition.

y’all. all I ever ever wanted to be growing up was an archaeologist. or paleontologist. or anthropologist. or a combination of those three. I didn’t, because… reasons… some having to do with a super conservative upbringing where women have a specific role and it doesn’t involve digging in the Valley of the Kings. and also an enormous lack of self confidence. and a general fear of getting the thing that I want. and my college counselor telling me she would’t write me a recommendation to the schools with the good archaeology departments.

“why would you want to do all of that work, when you’ll know all the answers when you get to heaven anyways?” (not a quote from my guidance counselor, just a thing I was told growing up.) but what the actual fork?!

ancient-architecture-camel-931881 — Photo by Simon Matzinger from Pexels

the point – I’ve stopped listening to MSNBC in the car, and while I miss Nicole Wallace and the righteous rage of Steve Schmidt I don’t miss the anxiety or Joe Scarborough’s pompous snark. So what have I been listening to instead? Glad you asked. I’ve been listening to National Geographic’s: The Great Courses. Specifically Archaeology: An Introduction to the World’s Greatest Sites. Which, I did NOT pay 234.95 for, I used a single Audible credit. (14.95) And while I feel a little jealous when he is obviously showing images to the camera I also feel like I can put the $220.00 that I saved towards my Nile River Cruise in 2022.

it is a FANTASTIC listen, and one I highly recommend. Chapter 10 is “How do you excavate at a site?” and he goes into specific things like tools (Marshalltown Trowels, everyone should bring their own) to pick axes. (provided at the site). at one point he says something about how his dig volunteers are mostly students but they’re not all students. sometimes they’re retired doctors or people who want to check ‘archaeological dig’ off of their bucket list. at which point, 5 minutes from the office, at 7:30 in the morning, I’m crying in my car.

I can do that! I’m 42 and the fact that I’m not an archaeologist is 100% on me now and next year we will have 2 kids in college so volunteering on a dig sounds about my speed.

You can come with me if you want.

ancient-archaeology-architecture-631339 — Photo by Frans Van Heerden from Pexels

Happy Halloween! xoxo

Three Favorites Thursday – distracted and anxious edition.

I’m waiting to hear if there’s a cement truck stuck in the mud of my backyard. We’ve had SO MUCH RAIN and they’re going to pour the cement pad for my studio today – and then the studio gets delivered tomorrow. And as of lunchtime, today has EASILY been three days long, with the first of those two days occurring between 7:28 and 9:30am. My right eye won’t stop twitching, which makes me think I need: 1. to relax because this isn’t my circus anymore. and 2. botox, because we all know I’m not going to stop stressing out, so the next best thing is just to paralyze those bitches into submission.

simplefavor I’m reading A Simple Favor, which I’m enjoying immensely even if the narrator is a HOT MESS. It is one of those “domestic thrillers” where no character is particularly likable. Our unreliable narrator is a blogger and a wannabe-super-mom who needs a lot of outside approval and I pretty much hate her and her blog and her writing style and I want to punch her in the face. So if you find yourself wanting to punch ME in the face you should tell me. I’m not likely to change my writing style though- this disjointed addiction to terrible grammar, loose capitalization, and incomplete sentences has been carefully honed over 40 years of desperately ignoring English teachers and refusing to diagram a single sentence correctly. Tense! Structure! Run-on! all the red pencil markings.

one

So today I’m calming my tits in my newest Thirdlove bra – I fricking love these bras. The lining is just squishy enough to keep things smooth, the straps are comfortable, they’re supportive, they wash well and they’re pretty. I have a few of them. (or 6, I have 6) The commercials all talk about how women are racing home after work to take their bras off – this is not true in my case. I’m a bra wearer. I like them, I want the girls supported at all times. Those cami tanks with the built in shelf bra? I love those for sleeping. Everything’s gotta be strapped in or I’m going to be cranky and then I’m going to sleep like shit and then EVERYONE will be cranky. I’ll make sure of it.

Screen Shot 2018-09-20 at 11.08.19 AM — it’s so pretty!

Pretty sure this link gives you $30 off your first bra. Which is a pretty good deal. It also gives me $30 off my next bra. Which is also a pretty good deal.

twotwotwo

thegoodplace

HOLY MOTHER FORKING SHIRT BALLS, y’all. The Good Place is back next Thursday! (the 27th) Eleanor Shellstrop is one of my favorite fictional humans ever. She’s so terrible and flawed and funny and I really want her to get her shirt figured right the heck out. The first 2 seasons are available to watch on Netflix. The episodes are short- it’s a sitcom- they’re like 17 minutes of pure distilled 100 proof joy. The cast is outstanding, the storyline is stupid and wonderful and I love it.

Watching this show makes me feel better, it’s like a mini vacation from the worlds ugly bullshirt.

three3

Big girl pants! I’m in the dress version of Mickey Mouse right now – black and white polka dots with a scalloped v-neckline, red Tieks and a bright yellow necklace from Manic Trout. I love this whole outfit, it is fun. But most days lately I want to wear a pair of Wit & Wisdom AbSolution pants with a t-shirt (from Universal Standard), blazer and my Rothy’s. These pants are RIDICULOUS.

witwisdom

I know I’ve talked about these before – I’ve gotten a couple of pairs in my Trunk Club Trunks.

We aren’t allowed to wear jeans in the office but these pants are cut like jeans, and feel like the most comfortable pair of jeans- I love them. They’re even comfortable for road trips and flights and I might have worn the same pair of black ones every day last week. (I washed them, but only because I absolutely had to.)

Then this weekend I discovered that I own two pairs of the black ones, I’ve got at least 3 of the white, a pair of olive, some camo… I like finding them on Poshmark for WAY less than they sell for at Nordstrom. You’re using Poshmark, right?

Here’s hoping the 2nd half of this day is only three hours long, and not several more days. I need Friday.

xoxo

Pretending to Shop.

boxes — Not my front door. (but a reasonable facsimile)

We moved our oldest into her dorm yesterday. And on Thursday our youngest starts her senior year of high school. I should never shop again with the tuition payments I have to look forward to but I pretty much bought the internet last week – so this week I’m not buying anything.

But if I were, here’s what I’d get:

boots

I have these boots in black suede from last year and I think I wore them 3 days a week. From my maternal grandmother I inherited the calves of a professional soccer player, she loved her giant calves, I struggle with feelings about my own but I’m trying- they work hard and let me walk super fast. But they make it hard to find boots, I’d rather shop for a bathing suit than a pair of boots. I get sweaty and cranky. So I usually wear ankle boots. But the Calypso boot changed all that. Look at that stretchy back panel – I love these so much! And this year they’re in leather! I need them.

Just not today. (I did put them into a shopping cart on Friday though, and have gotten a couple of emails from Sole Society with coupons to get me to pull the trigger. We are at 15% right now, it gets to 20% I might not be able to control myself…)

Screen Shot 2018-08-24 at 8.50.48 PM

Having a fight or flight reaction that leads to lots of shopping AND the mass ingestion of Haribo Berries – is not doing my wallet or my blood sugar any favors.

vanilla-chocoate-chip-848-candy-box-alt1

But speaking of eating my feelings, I would also have bought myself a couple of boxes of See’s Vanilla Chocolate Chip chocolates. “but Erin, they’re only 5.99” you’re adorable, I’d get at least 2, and while I was there I’d probably put together a custom 2 pound box. and did you know that you can buy bags of baking chocolate chips? because you can. And just like that…

justlikethat

…I’ve spent 115$ on chocolates.

The end of summer is an inevitability. Boots and cute jackets make the 45 minutes that is the Fall season much easier to accept. HOW CUTE IS THIS JACKET from Torrid?! I love it. And on sale. And faux leather, so when fall gets rainy (like it does) or snowy (because New England) you can wear it without worrying that you’re going to turn into your very own Seinfeld episode.

Screen Shot 2018-08-27 at 9.09.40 AM

Yesterday I got an email from Universal Standard (yep, that’s a referral link) to tell me they’d launched a few new dresses that have my damn name ALL OVER THEM. I really really want this dress.

carrea

Because HELLO perfect perfect dress. Which at $80 is 1/3 the price of similar Eileen Fisher dresses.

There were more things, I put at least three other things in shopping carts across the internet today, but I don’t remember any of them, so I’m glad I didn’t actually get them!

stilllives Two things I DID buy though – I got a copy of Still Lives by Maria Hummel which I am very excited to read. I’m usually anti book-club-books because of the Cult of Oprah and her books all being ‘tragic stories of the triumph of the human spirit’. NO. get away from me with that. But the books that Reece Witherspoon has been scooping up to turn into movies and shows have been awesome. So I’m giving this one a shot. I’ve been ALL ABOUT books written by women, and thrillers. So you should read it with me and we can talk about it later. But not like a book-club because my brain will turn the read into homework.

And I also bought a digital copy of Oceans 8. Because of Cate Blanchett’s wardrobe. And Awkwafina. and my deep abiding love for Sandra Bullock movies. And the whole cast is flawless. I enjoyed it very much. It got shit reviews and yeah, I’m going to say that a great deal of that is just bullshit sexism. So watch it, it’ll be fun.

oceans8

What have you been eyeing but not buying?

xoxo

Three Favorites Thursday. v2.

It has already been a week and I have NOTHING to show for it other than that I’m down a tooth and have never wanted a steak more than I do right now. But like I said in my first ever post – everything is my favorite – so I can always find 3 things to share with y’all.

one1

Hint Water. I am an advertiser’s dream audience. I read a story in Forbes about how when Karen Goldin, founder of Hint, approached Coca Cola to sell her company one of the execs called her “sweetie”, after which point she decided to go it on her own and I’ve been getting two cases delivered every other week since then. I used to drink a LOT of Coke, and I still love it, but now it’s a legit treat and not a thing I’m addicted to (I’ve weaned myself off of any caffeine addiction) and I think Hint had something to do with that. It just tastes so good, and my kidneys are so much happier with all of the hydration.

Heck yes, I have a discount code for you. $10 off of your first case. You can get individual bottles at places like Target, and likely your grocery store. Find your favorite and try a case. (the Fizz is also really good!)

two222

I’m like a pre-schooler, wrapping things I find in my house to give to my parents for Christmas. I’m just looking around my house and through my phone to come up with my ideas. (I’m drinking a watermelon Hint while I type this.)

I have a couple of things for #2, and they are both “Things that smell like the beach” so I’ll just say Things that Smell like the Beach are my favorite.

miamibeach First is Lush Sea Salt Spray – I fricking love it, it smells like the beach – sand, sun, the ocean, sunscreen… in the summertime I don’t like to blow dry my hair so Sea Salt Spray gets liberal use. In the wintertime I miss the sun so I used it a lot then too…

Second is Bobbi Brown’s Beach perfume. If I have a scent that I want people to associate with me (other than tacos or brownies) it would be this perfume.

Those are both awesome, if you know of other delicious beach scented things for me let me know and I’ll buy them. Things that would make my house smell like the beach would especially be appreciated!

three3

And the third thing that I can’t live without. (right now) The writing styles of Ilona Andrews. Ilona Andrews is actually the pen name of a husband/wife writing duo from Texas who write some straight up delicious urban fantasy garbage. The kinds of books that make me extra glad to be reading on a Kindle Paperwhite because the have covers that look like this:

wildfire — Book 3 in the Hidden Legacies series. I’m reading this right now. It is terrible and I love it.

I was introduced to them through the now-dissolved Vaginal Fantasy Book Club which was the brain child of Felicia Day, Bonnie Burton, Veronica Belmont and Kiara Kazebee. Clean Sweep was an alternate pick one month and I loved it. It is about a witch who is an innkeeper at a B&B in Texas – her guests are intergalactic travelers and werewolves. These books are SO FUN. They do have some sexytimes (way more in the Hidden Legacies series than in the Innkeeper Chronicles for sure, blushable levels for sure) so if that is going to be an issue then I can recommend some other things I’ve been enjoying lately. (a series of cozy mysteries about a shopkeeper in Amish country, with titles like: A Churn for the Worse, for example)

So – there are my Three Thursday Favorites for this week. I’m off to finish this ridiculous book.

xoxo