Swampass Science

TW: blood & sweat

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is he eating a marshmallow? I want a marshmallow… 

Despite my firm “not shopping” stance I have ordered 5 different undergarments to science out the whole Disney Parks Swampass situation when I’m there later this month.

So far I’ve ordered a pair of Knix, a pair of Thinx, a pair of Cooling ThighSociety shorts, a pair of UnderSummers and a pair of Drirelease TomboyX boxers, I’ve also ordered a pair of bandlettes for the non-undershorts times.

Knix and Thinx are technically period panties but I’m operating under ‘liquid is liquid’ an if it absorbs blood it should absorb sweat, right?

“But Erin” you say “you’re only going to have 3 park days!”

Yup, but (and since we are really oversharing right now) I usually change clothes halfway through the day because I’m a SWEATY BITCH and I like to be comfortable.

I will also be in Austin and Lubbock Texas, so I’ll try stuff out there as well.

SO. what else should I be trying? I prefer shorts since I like wearing skirts and dresses at Disney for air-flow but I’m willing to try non-shorts as well.

I feel like I should add a couple more Disney days… 😂

I’m not the only one with crotch temperature on the brain. The Bloggess is also tackling the science… Read it! (The science of crotches)

I love her.

 

xoxo

three favorites thursday, summer survival 1.0

sometimes it feels like I’m Columbusing these picks…. I mean, people know this shiz is awesome, that’s why it is available, but *I* didn’t always know this shiz was awesome – so enjoy these brand new discoveries which I will name and personally take credit for.

 

 

number1

TomboyX boxers. Gender neutral boxers in outstanding patterns and GREAT fabric. I bought a pair of these on clearance after halloween to wear under skirts at Disney – because if I can’t wear jeans I definitely prefer skirts or dresses and with my… shapely… thighs I need some friction protection. Normally this takes the form of Jockeys Skimmies which are pretty damn magical but I… and here you learn more about me than anyone needs to… I’m sweaty and I’m a bit of a prude who went to all girls school so I can’t wear skimmies without wearing underwear under them so there’s 2 layers under my skirt and twice the chance to get really forking sweaty.

annnnnyways. boxers. these are now my go-to under skirts and I managed to get a day in Disney in May while I was wearing these and they worked pretty great! I was still sweaty but I didn’t feel as gross. (moments ago I ordered a pair of Knix, I’m going to try those in the park next month, I could literally have an entire blog about Disney swampass avoidance techniques)

Yesterday I also ordered a pair of TomboyX drirelease performance boxers because I’m desperate. look for the update on those in the swampass blog sometime in August. lucky you.

also- I’m a big girl AND (I had originally written “but” here, as if big girls can’t have good asses, when of course we do!)  I’ve got a pretty good booty and it looks BOMB in these.  new favorite pjs. and the sizes they stock! they go up to 4X. amazing and inclusive. I love them. you will also.

use this link to get $20 off your first $70 purchase (which would make it a $50 purchase…)

 

number2

I normally use Rodan & Fields for my skincare routine but while I was in Florida in January I took my oldest to Sephora to replace her face wash and she got this First Aid Beauty Skin Rescue red clay cleanser and it is amazing. I had to go back to buy myself one and I’m on my second replacement tube of it right now. So so good.  Not drying but definitely feels clean when I’m done, smells really good, I love it. And it is available from Amazon, and also from Sephora, who has a great return policy.

fab

and, while we are talking about products I’ve had for a while and only started using recently (like the boxers…) I’ve started using The Ordinary’s Peeling Solution and this stuff is LEGIT. I use it twice a week and can immediately feel and see a difference in the glow and texture of my skin. 10 minutes 2x a week, I’ve only been using it for 3 weeks but I’m liking what I’m seeing so far. Also I love spending those 10 minutes looking like I’ve just had one of those Kardashian vampire facials but with acid, and without the possibility for deadly blood borne diseases. win win. The peel is much cheaper at Sephora unless you have to pay for shipping – also if you can place an 8.00 Sephora order let me know – I have never seen such a feat.

ordinary

go get that glow on.

 

 

 

 

number3

 

being hydrated. my youngest is going to college next year. I thought it was hard sending my oldest to vermont, but now my baby is going to texas and I’m going to miss them both so damn much. so I’m crying a lot. and it’s leaving me straight up dehydrated. like, waking up after not drinking feeling hungover, dehydrated.

which is where water comes in. seriously. #3 is water. we have one of those water coolers in the kitchen with the 5 gallon bottles – and the water IN the bottles comes from a spring maybe 1500 yards from our house sitting beneath the oldest bottling plant in the US (Simpson Spring) and it is delicious.

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behold! the Hamilton S’well. a bottle good enough to have a name, if it weren’t already called the Hamilton S’well.

though this is not about water – this is about the GREATEST WATER BOTTLE IN THE WORLD. (in my opinion) I filled it with ice yesterday morning and it is still full of ice this morning.  I got it last fall when I was finally able to see Hamilton and have used it every day since then. it was FIFTY DOLLARS which is dumb stupid for a water bottle – or I thought it was – but I love a theater Merch Bar (<–you can buy it at that link if you want the Hamilton version!) and I know I’m not wearing all the t-shirts I’ve bought so I switched it up with the water bottle.

If you don’t want to spend $50 on a water bottle (and honestly, who does?) the non-Hamilton versions of this bottle are very frequently for sale for $25 – $30 on the S’well website. The sale items vary by season, there are some really cool ones right now, I keep wanting to buy another but I HAVE ONE, they’re indestructible, I’m not going to need another one ever.

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part of the sale section from swellbottle.com right now

I travel with this – which is funny EVERY time I’m in the airport security line as I’m chugging 17 ounces of cold water – but that means it is also my Disney Parks water bottle and in the sun the bottle itself gets quite warm but the contents are always cold. maybe I should get a parks bottle that isn’t black… 😁

and if you use ebates (soon to become Rakuten) please tell me you use ebates! if not sign up here (<–click on that) and we both get a bonus! The cash back bonus for s’well is 3% which is not too shabby! 

 

anyhow – there are my three favorites for Spring/Summer 2019 – poor little abandoned blog.

 

xoxo

 

 

 

 

 

 

not shopping my feelings, stream of consciousness edition

If you’re ever sitting with me at a party or a dinner and I’ve had a couple of drinks and I’m rambling and nervous it will sound exactly like this:

 

I’m not shopping for things I don’t need, I would ordinarily also say “No Target” but I’ve been finding that my grocery store is really anxiety inducing for me right now, so I’m doing my grocery shopping at Target as well. So – I went to Target with a list this morning and bought ONLY the things on my list, I picked up Oreos and PUT THEM BACK because they weren’t on my list, it’s bullshit, next time I’m putting Oreos on the list. Last night I had to order some new earplugs and I felt a little weird about it, but I love my husband and want to stay married while also valuing my sleep and what is left of my sanity so… $6.49 at Amazon later… if you love a snorer I can’t stress enough how amazing these are. When I flew Mint on JetBlue they gave me a little pouch with some treats for my flight and they included a pair of these earplugs, (also socks, an eye mask, a toothbrush, toothpaste, face spritz and hand lotion) I hoard the earplugs like gold but I’m on my last pair so… I should also note that I’m really good at snoring, so when I travel I always make sure to bring them for anyone who might get stuck sleeping near me. is this a weird thing for me to recommend? probably, but this is the glamorous on-brand shit you come here for, right?

 

 

Sidenote that is a little more glamorous and also available on Amazon- I just noticed how good I smell and this stuff (Lalicious Sugar Kiss Sugar Scrub) is AMAZING – I smell like the Confectionary at Disney World and it helps my winter skin SO MUCH. My feet are smooth, in March!, it’s unheard of. I usually feel like I’m mid-mummification in the winter. (it is still very winter here) The downside is it makes my shower very slippery – so keep a bottle of shower cleaner to spray the floor with when you get out of the shower. it is 40$, which is a lot for a thing you’re going to use in the shower, but I think it is worth it.

 


 

I keep a note on my iphone with a list of things I’d like to blog about, obviously Disney stays on there at #1, because it is the source of all happiness. (for me, your mileage may vary, in which case you might want to get your mileage checked.) But this ‘not shopping’ experiment is also up there- as is selling on Poshmark – in fact “Poshmark to Disney” is #6. Our youngest daughter and her whole school  music department is going to Disney World for a series of performances in April, so Dave & I are going too. That trip is already paid for – but I have another scheduled for October and I’m challenging myself to pay for that trip using the Poshmark decluttering process. It is pretty motivating. It is also keeping me honest about the shopping cessation.

you know what ISN’T helping with the shopping cessation? Rothy’s. I got an email from them earlier with a $20 discount code in it (which is AWESOME, because their shoes are my favorite, bit I’m not shopping right now!) and then about 20 minutes later I get this email…

rothys
UGH. how amazing are those?! Thanks, Rothy’s.

 


 

I have an appointment with a lawyer on Wednesday to get the ball rolling on my new company! I feel nauseous I’m so nervous. it is like I’ve been out of work forever – and while I am LOVING being here when G leaves for school and being here when she gets home, and getting to spend last week hanging out with K while she was home on spring break, and being able to sleep until 7 and spending most of my day without shoes on… this is the first time since I was 20 that I haven’t made a regular check. And I know that starting my own company – it’ll be a good while yet before my checks are regular… but I’m ready to get started.  And I don’t have a location so… I’ll be able to work barefoot for a little bit longer. and if I’m barefoot I don’t even NEED new Rothy’s. right?

(sometimes *I* count the number of times *I’ve* said *I* and *I* get real self conscious about it… *I’m* not this interesting.)

ugh. Let’s talk about Shrill soon.

xoxo

Selling my shopped feelings. KonMariePoshmarkCBD edition.

I am entering my third month without a salary – which is FINE – which is something I prepared for – which is something I signed up for – BUT.  I’m still freaking the fork out pretty much 24/7. So that, combined with Marie Kondo, blah blah blah. I’ve never watched an episode of the show, I’ve never read a page of the book, but I DID stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night, AND, I watched a video on how to fold t-shirts, so I feel like I’m an expert.

Let’s get started.

I am a big big fan of purging things. I might like getting rid of things more than I like getting new things, which is good because my house and my anxiety are at peak shirt right now. also peak shit.

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Shop my closet! I have excellent taste and limited space.

which brings us to Poshmark. which was once a place where I looked for 90’s tennis sweaters (don’t judge me, those things were hella cute.) but is now a place where I sell all of the shirt that doesn’t spark forking joy.  every morning after I wake up I put a couple of things in my “closet”. it makes me feel as if I’m accomplishing something, and it is an excellent reminder each day to STOP BRINGING THINGS INTO THE HOUSE OHMYGODERINJUSTSTOP.  Plus I’ve sold some stuff so… ka-ching. (here’s the link to my closet!)

and let’s be real fricking honest, I need that reminder because acquiring things is so fun. I need a hobby. I have a hobby. I need to get to work. I should have some plans and some direction in that regard by the end of next week.

I have to buckle down, and start busting my ass to become the person who has a very successful business and a great condo with a pool in Florida. I can see her, she DOESN’T SHOP UNLESS SHE NEEDS A THING.  (I don’t make new year’s resolutions, but if I did, that would be a good one.)

She did, however, order herself some CBD oil because she needed that shit. Currently I’ve got a tin of Bang Bang Chocolate CBD Dream Drops and I LOVE those, they are hecking awesome. You should get some, you won’t regret it at all.  Hotel San Jose in Austin has them as part of their mini-bar. One day I want to be as cool as that mini-bar. But, I am not going to walk around with a tin of chocolate in my purse all the time (which feels funny to say, because why the heck not?!) so I ordered some oil. We’ll see. I’m optimistic and trying not to use xanax as a regular crutch. so I’m getting a new regular crutch, duh! I can only work on like 17 things at a time, and getting to the root of my anxiety and finally dealing with it will have to wait.

dreamdrops
Bang Bang Chocolates. gitchusome.

so that’s where I am on this snowy monday. do you use poshmark? link your closet so we can promote one another!

xoxo

 

 

 

three favorites thursday – ‘cyber week’ edition.

cyberweek
who has two thumbs and didn’t know ‘cyber week’ was a thing? this guy.

Cyber Week. evidently that’s a thing now.  Because the onslaught of one time only, limited availability, lowest discount of the season, get it now or you will ruin the holidays forever, isn’t enough on Black Friday and Cyber Monday. It’s Cyber Thursday, do you know where your children are? (and THAT’S how old I am)

I haven’t really done any ‘cyber week’ shopping – I keep thinking I want to, filling up shopping carts, but then abandoning them. But I did find a few things that I think will make excellent presents.


 

uno

Lin Manuel Miranda. He’s a gift to all of us already, but now his inspirational Gmorning, Gnight messages are illustrated in their own fabulous little book. I have so far purchased three copies of it but reserve the right to give it to EVERYONE this Christmas.

gmorning

your children FOR SURE need this. their teachers might also. siblings. aunts and uncles. the postal worker who delivers all of your packages – you fiend. you need it, your spouse. the world. the world needs this book.

Get one.

LMM’s website (Tee Rico) also has Gnight PAJAMAS. because who doesn’t need a sleep shirt or cozy pants?

 

 



 

 

rosegold2

my very very favorite eyeshadow palette. I have LOTS of palettes, drawers full, it’s obscene. and usually I wear one color (that isn’t even in this palette) (Urban Decay Lounge)  But when I’m not being lazy I bust out the Tartlette In Bloom Palette.

inbloom
neutral but rosy but shimmery but sophisticated

Right now Macy’s has a 15% off code (FRIEND) which makes this just over 33$. BUT if you use Ebates (which you fricking should, and if you don’t please sign up with my link!) today everything at Macy’s will get you 10% cash back.

 

brush

My favorite eyeshadow brush. the only one I ever ever use and the only one you will ever ever need. (unless you’re wicked fancy in which case I can’t help you) is from Coastal Scents, it is the BR-C-N02 a Medium, Classic, Natural brush and it is a WORKHORSE. I have been using, washing, using, washing, the same brush for at least 5 years.

If you know and love and shop for makeup wearers this will be their favorite stocking stuffer. If you combine it with In Bloom you’ll win Christmas.

 

 




 

 

threethree

unrelated to Christmas shopping, other than that you need sustenance to keep you going, my other favorite thing this cyber week is Trader Joe’s Spanakopita Pie.  I’m on my second one for the week already and I have no regrets. TJ’s was sold out of tzatziki when I went so I had to go to my regular grocery store to get some, because it’s the other best part of this meal.

spanakopita
you’re going to want to get one of these today. maybe get 2.

it’s that perfect amount of salty and flaky and still feels like you’re eating healthy because the thing is full of spinach. Plus it’s pie. It’s the best of all possible worlds.

I am starving right now.


 

So that’s what I’ve got. Good Luck tomorrow on Cyber Friday and through what I assume will be the Cyber Weekend…?

 

xoxo

holidaying my feelings – why is there so much crap in my house? edition

treeatnight
we decorated EARLY this year and I’m not sorry.

It’s weird to get to a place where you don’t want anything. but I don’t. I don’t want a single thing. I have EVERYTHING I need. I have MORE THAN I NEED.  I am getting rid of things at a steady pace.

part of the particular nature/nurture strain of anxiety/depression that I inherited from my father leads to purging. I try to be very conscious of what I get rid of because I want to make sure I have art my kids made in kindergarten, or baby photos, or my husband’s letterman jacket. dad was a reckless purger so there are things from my childhood that I would have preferred to not end up in a dumpster while I was in college… like anything from my childhood. Ten points to the X-ers in charge of our entertainment, because I can at least have NEW things of whatever things I don’t have from my childhood. Jem? Good Luck Bear? A Vintage style My Little Pony? A fricking Zoom birthday record?! They exist again and I could have all of those things.

but I don’t want them.

hygge
tea, cake, making lists. some of my favorites.

so right, while the holidays approach, and Winter is Coming, and I really want to start getting my house renovated, and things are happening in my professional life that I can’t/haven’t told everyone about yet… I’m fucking stressed out. I’m also really fucking depressed. I said that out loud to myself in the car the other day. “I am really fucking depressed” and the moment of acknowledging my feelings for what they are… it helped. I mean, Wellbutrin helps more, but recognition is important.

and I need to get a dumpster which currently has me REALLY worried because I do want to get rid of every.fucking.thing. in my house.

I speak only for myself and my own experiences with depression but if I had to make a list of things I “want” or “need” for Christmas right now they would include: socks, a throw blanket or four, a magically clean kitchen and front hallway unaccompanied by the sounds of angry cleaning, new toss pillows for the couch, cake, dark curtains in my bedroom for naps, naps, for my house to smell like a Christmas tree, candles in every room, having the dining room table completely clear… chocolate. See’s or Phillip’s Candy House especially. The soft ones with fruity creme centers. Or a trip to Disney. But mostly I need Hygge.

Hygge-2

I want Hygge for Christmas.

xoxo

 

Three Favorites Thursday – distracted and anxious edition.

I’m waiting to hear if there’s a cement truck stuck in the mud of my backyard. We’ve had SO MUCH RAIN and they’re going to pour the cement pad for my studio today – and then the studio gets delivered tomorrow. And as of lunchtime, today has EASILY been three days long, with the first of those two days occurring between 7:28 and 9:30am. My right eye won’t stop twitching, which makes me think I need: 1. to relax because this isn’t my circus anymore. and 2. botox, because we all know I’m not going to stop stressing out, so the next best thing is just to paralyze those bitches into submission.

simplefavorI’m reading A Simple Favor, which I’m enjoying immensely even if the narrator is a HOT MESS. It is one of those “domestic thrillers” where no character is particularly likable. Our unreliable narrator is a blogger and a wannabe-super-mom who needs a lot of outside approval and I pretty much hate her and her blog and her writing style and I want to punch her in the face. So if you find yourself wanting to punch ME in the face you should tell me. I’m not likely to change my writing style though- this disjointed addiction to terrible grammar, loose capitalization, and incomplete sentences has been carefully honed over 40 years of desperately ignoring English teachers and refusing to diagram a single sentence correctly. Tense! Structure! Run-on! all the red pencil markings.

 

 

 

one

So today I’m calming my tits in my newest Thirdlove bra – I fricking love these bras. The lining is just squishy enough to keep things smooth, the straps are comfortable, they’re supportive, they wash well and they’re pretty. I have a few of them. (or 6, I have 6)  The commercials all talk about how women are racing home after work to take their bras off – this is not true in my case. I’m a bra wearer. I like them, I want the girls supported at all times.  Those cami tanks with the built in shelf bra? I love those for sleeping. Everything’s gotta be strapped in or I’m going to be cranky and then I’m going to sleep like shit and then EVERYONE will be cranky. I’ll make sure of it.

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it’s so pretty! 

Pretty sure this link gives you $30 off your first bra. Which is a pretty good deal. It also gives me $30 off my next bra. Which is also a pretty good deal.

 

 

 

twotwotwo

thegoodplace

HOLY MOTHER FORKING SHIRT BALLS, y’all. The Good Place is back next Thursday! (the 27th) Eleanor Shellstrop is one of my favorite fictional humans ever. She’s so terrible and flawed and funny and I really want her to get her shirt figured right the heck out. The first 2 seasons are available to watch on Netflix. The episodes are short- it’s a sitcom- they’re like 17 minutes of pure distilled 100 proof joy. The cast is outstanding, the storyline is stupid and wonderful and I love it.

Watching this show makes me feel better, it’s like a mini vacation from the worlds ugly bullshirt.

 

 

three3

Big girl pants! I’m in the dress version of Mickey Mouse right now – black and white polka dots with a scalloped v-neckline, red Tieks and a bright yellow necklace from Manic Trout. I love this whole outfit, it is fun. But most days lately I want to wear a pair of Wit & Wisdom AbSolution pants with a t-shirt (from Universal Standard), blazer and my Rothy’s. These pants are RIDICULOUS.

witwisdom

I know I’ve talked about these before – I’ve gotten a couple of pairs in my Trunk Club Trunks.

We aren’t allowed to wear jeans in the office but these pants are cut like jeans, and feel like the most comfortable pair of jeans- I love them. They’re even comfortable for road trips and flights and I might have worn the same pair of black ones every day last week. (I washed them, but only because I absolutely had to.)

Then this weekend I discovered that I own two pairs of the black ones, I’ve got at least 3 of the white, a pair of olive, some camo… I like finding them on Poshmark for WAY less than they sell for at Nordstrom.  You’re using Poshmark, right?

 

 

Here’s hoping the 2nd half of this day is only three hours long, and not several more days. I need Friday.

xoxo